I think the most cruel thing you can do to your child is to set up a couple for them to get engaged to or get married to without consulting with them first. WHY?
Okay firstly, it will be okay to arrange an engagement perhaps only if both, I REPEAT..BOTH side does not have someone in their life, meaning to say whether they have a couple already or not. Why? Of course they will say NO to the engagement, DUHHHH.
I mean why would you force them to get engage if they don't want to? What are you doing? Ripping their lives? Of course marriage is a good thing. Who says its not? It is, but wait until the time is right. Even if you think 'oh she's probably not going to get married, she's aging so fast', believe it or not, if the time is right, they will sooner or later eventually get married. It's all in God's hands they say.
Secondly, isn't forcing a bad thing? If you feel forced then don't do it. EASY. Of course, respecting our parents is like no.2 priority in life and no.1 is trust in God, but God is loving and caring, He Himself will not force you to follow Him, did He? Soooo... why would you obey your parents(in terms of force engagement or marriage) if you really really REALLY don't want to do it? You're afraid you will be a sinner for disobeying your parents? PUH-LEASE we are all a sinner. Adding 1 more sin would not make a difference (but try not to make a sin lol). So it is not your fault if you don't want to. Your happiness in the future depends on you, not your parents. Its you who will be engaged or married, not your parents, so why bother forcing yourself to agree if its actually all in your hands?
I'm quite what..angry? well, the process is like this, imagine that you are the boss sitting in your office, then your parents are the people under you who presents a project plan and you are the one who will approve it or not. Your parents present a project, but you disapprove it, is it normal for them to force you to approve it? Like constantly trying to force you to approve it? Saying that if you don't approve it, you will bring shame to the company or so. That is just so sad, I'm sorry.
Obeying your parents is important, I know. But you are old enough to be choosing your partner in life. Your happiness is in your hands. Remember that you are old enough to choose your path in life. I'm not saying not to listen completely what your parents said, but some things are better if you make it and do it yourself. Parents need to understand that, so does the children. I know, parents only want the best for their child, but learn to give space to them to know and experience life. If they are happy, so will you.
And for anyone who are experiencing being forced into something you don't want to, relax, focus on your answer. If you don't want it, talk about it. Sit down with whomever and try to talk it our softly and think of a solution. =)
